October 9, 2012

Dirty D Week 5 Power Ranks

1. Tahiti Loungers (last week #2)- Ryan Mathews is a beast. Anyone who doesn't think so didn't watch the game Sunday night. He's the same fantasy player as Darren McFadden and has established himself as a weekly top 5 back until further notice. I've decided to put in print what I've believed for years: Arian Foster is the best weekly bet for a TD in the NFL. I think I heard last night he has 39 TDs in 40 career games. Decker, Smith, and White all had slow games for me, I still scored 126 points and the return of Aaron Hernandez couldn't be better timed with the black unicorn banged up and a HUGE matchup with Team Ice Cream this week. Want more proof this isn't a "homer" pick? Since I made the major trade(s) to acquire Rodgers and White, my team has scored the most points (421) in the league. The next highest scorer in that time frame (3 weeks) is my sister, Jenna at 406.  

2. Eat More Chicken (last week #3)- Jenna squeaked out a very, VERY close matchup with a 137-136 win over Campbell. Through 5 weeks this team has scored more than any other- but with some terrible luck Jenna only has 2 wins. I highly doubt this team can keep up the scoring pace, the starting lineup is very good- but this team has literally no depth and I can't see how that won't catch up to her.  She DID survive this past week with Megatron on bye, and the return of Mendenhall couldn't have been more perfectly timed. This team can't really withstand anymore injuries. We'll see how long Jenna remains up here in the upper-echelon of the Power Ranks but for now, everyone else (especially the Burlones and the Cosgroves) can sit back and watch the Brown family dominate. 

3. Team Ice Cream (last week #1)- Out of nowhere, Adam laid an egg and scored the lowest score of the week with only 87 points. What's more concerning is the injuries to RG3 and Finley. Both seem to be OK, both claim to be ready to suit up next week. Finley let's just face it is a middling TE option. He has a long track record of dropping passes and even though he is dripping with potential... it ain't happenin. RG3 just takes way too many hits, Adam does have Vick as a backup so its not a huge drop off but it's playing with fire when both your Qbs are small and mobile and take a lot of hits. If anyone one of the WR outside of AJ Green on this team starts producing, I would feel better about this roster moving forward (And there are plenty of them on this team with the potential to bust out). This week's matchup vs my team should be a really entertaining one and would be a very good win for Adam. Hopefully the 87 points was but a blip on the radar, let us not forget Adam came out to a blistering start last year too, only to finish in 2nd to last place. I don't see that happening this year but it HAS to be in his head. 

4. Crossing Guards (last week #8)-  The GM of the week award goes to Bill for sure. Half of his team was on a bye, so Bill made moves (acquired AP, Romo) and pulled out the biggest blow out of the week vs the only undefeated team. Romo is very, very shaky but I think coming out of the bye the Cowboys will figure some stuff out and he will be better. This team is pretty stacked, I'd def take bets w/ anyone who thinks Bill isn't making the playoffs this year. Bill has 3 straight weeks with a completely full roster and semi-weak opponents so this is the part of the schedule where Bill can pile up W's. 

5. A Pinch Better (last week #4)- I really dislike this team. If I were to make a list of a team roster's I'd like to own, this would be last. Victor Cruz is a God amongst men, but after that I want to scratch my eyes out when looking at this horrible team. I suppose Marshawn Lynch is solid too but I've never liked him. I don't know how Sean is the 3rd highest scoring team, but I do know that this team will never win the championship as is. The only positive thing I have to say about this organization is that I know Sean is trying to make moves like crazy to fix his team. He has AWFUL trade etiquette, so trade partners beware; Sean is a scum bag when it comes to trading and he may verbally agree to a trade but his word means very little. He is super shady when it comes to betting and trading.  

6. A1 Providers (last week #6)- Paul dropped a BOMB on Donny this week, another win fueled largely by Brees/Welker. I struggle to rank this team any higher, though. Benson is going to be out the rest of the season and it won't be long until Turner hits a wall and this team starts to decline. It's nice that Paul has stacked up 4 wins already though (largely the result of the easiest schedule so far), he is going to be close to the playoff bubble I think. This week will be a challenge for Paul because Brees is on a bye, so we will see if he can survive a week without one of the cornerstones of his roster. (My prediction is he loses to the Boston Patriots this week, FTR)

7. Victorious Secret (last week #5)- Another gross week for Kait. What's up with team? It's the opposite of A Pinch Better. I LOVE this roster, but nothing is coming together for Kait. Colston has really come one the past couple weeks, but per usual the QB position has been an enigma for Kait. In year's past Kait has leaned on that stud QB, but unless a major move is on the horizon Kait is going to have to learn to win with her elite RB/WR combos. I think she has enough fire power to get by with what she has, but a QB upgrade would be the move to make for this team. The RB depth here is exceptional.

8. the rental guys (last week #7)- Dan is a notorious complainer. He likes to chirp me via text all the time but isn't man enough to publicize his opinions or thoughts for everyone else to see. I can't say I blame him for avoiding accountability... In the past he has cried "trade rape" and in nearly every occasion he has been wrong and made to look a fool. SO I made a deal with him, I would not say anything about his team anymore and he agreed not to bitch/comment about my power rankings. He says I am a homer for ranking my team so favorably, I counter with the idea that I back up all my opinions with fact and these are my own personal rankings anyway. Hate on hater. 

9. The Godfather (last week #11)- Huge Week for Abe. This is clearly a Boom-or-Bust team, and Abe proved it with the highest week of the season so far at 162. If any of the WR on Abe's team wanted to step up and play, his team would be much more dangerous. However, if the status quo remains here, your looking at a 6-7 Jeckyll and Hyde type team that will cause headaches for both Abe and some of his opponents. I would be working the trade market pretty hard if I were Abe.  

10. Angry Pirates (last week #12)- Campbell lost again and fell to 0-5. The playoffs at this point are probably nothing but a dream. However, this is most certainly NOT the worst team in the league anymore. Campbell made another major move before this week and is trotting out a damn competitive lineup from now on. I'm sure the people below Campbell on this list will be upset with the leap frog but I predict Campbell finishing much closer to the middle of the pack in total points. Right now he is dead last since this past week was the first time he's broken 100 this year.   

11. Boston Patriots (last week #9)- This team is probably pretty frustrating to own. On paper, it looks more than solid. Mike Wallace, Jimmy Graham, and the Lawfirm all disappointed again this week... and you know the clock is ticking on Mr. Frank Glass. This team is good, but outside of that Week 1 outburst of 150 points this team has averaged just 105, which will get you a loss 90% of the time. I have some concerns and Mr. B isn't known for his in-season trading, unfortunately a move or 2 may be necessary for this team to get back in the playoff discussion. 

12. Comeback Story. (last week #10)- This team has too many uninspiring efforts to be ranked higher than this. The  140 point showing  in Week 2 was 26 points higher than any week Donny has had yet, and may very well be this team's ceiling. The WR depth on this team is really strong, however If I owned this team I would have been making moves weeks ago. MJD isn't good enough to carry this team on his back and every other RB on this team is garbage. Andrew Luck could maybe establish himself as a viable fantasy starter, but the fact remains he is a rookie and WILL have those games where he looks awful. And, let's face it,  Gronk in the first round was a reach and is hurting this team. Now that I have awarded this team the low spot on the ranks, maybe now there will be a chance for an amazing comeback story.... Just don't bet on it. 


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